Archive for August, 2002


August 7, 2002

I know my body is getting worse by the day. I sit on the floor to play with our cat and my legs go completely numb and lifeless after 5-10 minutes.

I told my dad about my weak moments I am having. I could be anywhere doing anyrhing and I would just begin feeling weak throughout my body. My hands would shake, tremor… It looks to be happening whenever I loose body fluid. For example, after I sweat profusely (frequently) or cry.

After completing the previous entry, I began crying heavily. Then, maybe 10-15 minutes after, my weak sensation returned. It happened when I went out to eat Friday. It happened near the beginning of seeing Signs at the theater on Saturday. And now again today. I told my dad only on Friday. I said to him it only happened once a week, if that. It just seems to be happening more and more often. I feel my time is coming.



My Life: Banned

August 6, 2002

I could be banned in chat. As the thought goes through my mind, I cry. Almost all I have left in this life is what I have online. Friends that I speak to everyday, that I can have fun with… I have no friends in real life. So I must grasp onto what I have left of my life, because I really don’t want to die. I don’t want to suicide.

My body is slowly dying. Diabetes. No hygiene. I have become a shell of what I once was. When my mother passed away when I was only 5, everything changed. Everything got worse and still continues to today. I do not blame her. It is not her fault.

I don’t want to die. But I refuse to live with no life. And in the life I lead now, I am happy in some ways. chat/internet, television, and DVDs are my sanctuary from my terrible life i live now. If I lose even one, I don’t know what I would do.


An ABC Family Degradation Rant

August 3, 2002

When the (US) Family Channel was purchased by FOX, I was overjoyed since I liked FOX. They made the station way better than it was before.

But last year, FOX sold FOX Family to ABC, making it ABC Family. Since then, the quality has been going downhill. Most of the shows that aired on FOX Family are being fizzled out and replaced. ABC Family has started some Saturday night love story garbage.

The only plus I see in this catastrophe is the morning kids’ block, airing 7-9am weekdays and 7am-noon weekends. Right now, I only regularly watch Shinzo and the Best of PR in this block. Shinzo’s out by Sept. 14th anyway. Disney seemed to have purchased Family mainly because Power Rangers were part of the deal. They own all 440+ episodes of the series that have aired on Fox Kids since 1993. Now they own it, so the new episodes look to be moving to ABC beginning sept. 14th after Fox Kids is history. No one really knows yet…

ABC’s series premiere will be a milestone episode, featuring all past red rangers returning for an epic battle. It is titled “Forever Red”. I can not wait to see this. Keep watching my airing schedules page for the true date once it’s known…

Well… see ya…


August 3, 2002

…yay… 🙂